Merry Christmas

Make a Smilebox scrapbook

Black Robbers

This SO sounds like something I would do.........Black Robbers For anyone who didn't see David Letterman¢s take on this: (And it's atrue story...) On a recent weekend in Atlantic City, a woman won a bucketful ofquarters at a slot machine. She took a break from the slots for dinner with herhusband in the hotel dining room. But first she wanted to stash the quarters inher room. 'I'll be right back k and we'll go to eat,' she toldher husband and carried the coin-laden bucket to the elevator.As she was about to walk into the elevator she noticed two men already aboard.Both were black. One of them was tall... very tall ...an intimidating figure.The woman froze... Her first thought was: 'These two are going to robme.' Her next thought was: 'Don't be a bigot; they look likeperfectly nice gentlemen.' But racial stereotypes are powerful, and fearimmobilized her. She stood and stared at the two men. She felt anxious,flustered and ashamed. She hoped they didn't read her mind but gosh, theyhad to know what she was thinking!!!Her hesitation about joining them in the elevator was all too obvious now. Herface was flushed. She couldn't just stand there, so with a mighty effort ofwill she picked up one foot and stepped forward and followed with the other footand was on the elevator. Avoiding eye contact, she turned around stiffly andfaced the elevator doors as they closed. A second passed, and then anothersecond, and then another. Her fear increased! The elevator didn't move.Panic consumed her. 'My God,' she thought, I'm trapped and about tobe robbed! 'Her heart plummeted. Perspiration poured from every pore.Then one of the men said, 'Hit the floor.' Instinct told her to do whatthey told her. The bucket of quarters flew upwards as she threw out her arms andcollapsed on the elevator floor. A shower of coins rained down on her. Take mymoney and spare me, she prayed. More seconds passed. She heard one of the mensay politely, 'Ma'am, if you'll just tell us what floor you'regoing to, we'll push the button.' The one who said it had a littletrouble getting the words out. He was trying mightily to hold in a belly laugh.The woman lifted her head and looked up at the two men. They reached down tohelp her up. Confused, she struggled to her feet. 'When I told my friendhere to hit the floor,' said the average sized one, 'I meant that heshould hit the elevator button for our floor. I didn't mean for you to hitthe floor, ma'am.' He spoke genially. He bit his lip. It was obvious hewas having a hard time not laughing. The woman thought: 'My God, what aspectacle I've made of myself.' She was too humiliated to speak. Shewanted to blurt out an apology, but words failed her. How do you apologize totwo perfectly respectable gentlemen for behaving as though they were going torob you? She didn't know what to say. The three of them gathered up thestrewn quarters and refilled her bucket. When the elevator arrived at her floorthey then insisted on walking her to her room. She seemed a little unsteady onher feet, and they were afraid she might not make it down the corridor. At herdoor they bid her a good evening. As she slipped into her room she could hearthem roaring with laughter as they walked back to the elevator. The womanbrushed herself off. She pulled herself together and went downstairs for dinnerwith her husband.The next morning flowers were delivered to her room - a dozen roses. Attachedto EACH rose was a crisp one hundred dollar bill.The card said: 'Thanks for the best laugh we've had in years.'It was signed; Eddie Murphy Michael JordanPS - Pass this around so others can enjoy! Black Robbers - a true story

Only a Man

ONLY A MAN WOULD ATTEMPT THIS
Just try reading this without laughing till you cry!!!
Pocket Taser Stun Gun, a great gift for the wife. A guy who purchased his lovely wife a pocket Taser for their anniversary submitted this: Last weekend I saw something at Larry's Pistol & Pawn Shop that sparked my interest. The occasion was our 15th anniversary and I was looking for a little something extra for my wife Julie. What I came across was a 100,000-volt, pocket/purse- sized taser. The effects of the taser were supposed to be short lived, with no long-term adverse affect on your assailant, allowing her adequate time to retreat to safety....?? WAY TOO C OOL! Long story short, I bought the device and brought it home. I loaded two AAA batteries in the darn thing and pushed the button. Nothing! I was disappointed. I learned, however, that if I pushed the button AND pressed it against a metal surface at the same time; I'd get the blue arc of electricity darting back and forth between the prongs. AWESOME!!! Unfortunately, I have yet to explain to Julie what that burn spot is on the face of her microwave. Okay, so I was home alone with this new toy, thinking to myself that it couldn't be all that bad with only two triple-A batteries, right? There I sat in my recliner, my cat Gracie looking on intently (trusting little soul) while I was reading the directions and thinking that I really needed to try this thing out on a flesh & blood moving target. I must admit I thought about zapping Gracie (for a fraction of a second) and thought better of it. She is such a sweet cat. But, if I was going to give this th i ng to my wife to protect herself against a mugger, I did want some assurance that it would work as advertised. Am I wrong? So, there I sat in a pair of shorts and a tank top with my reading glasses perched delicately on the bridge of my nose, directions in one hand, and taser in another. The directions said that a one-second burst would shock and disorient your assailant; a two-second burst was supposed to cause muscle spasms and a major loss of bodily control; a three-second burst would purportedly make your assailant flop on the ground like a fish out of water. Any burst longer than three seconds would be wasting the batteries. All the while I'm looking at this little device measuring about 5" long, less than 3/4 inch in circumference; pretty cute really and (loaded with two itsy, bitsy triple-A batteries) thinking to myself, 'no possible way!' What happened next is almost beyond description, but I'll do my best...?I'm sitting there alone, Gracie looking on with her head cocked to one side as to say, 'don't do it dipshit,' reasoning that a one second burst from such a tiny little ole thing couldn't hurt all that bad. I decided to give myself a one second burst just for heck of it. I touched the prongs to my naked thigh, pushed the button, and . . HOLY MOTHER OF GOD . . WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION . . . WHAT THE HELL!!! I'm pretty sure Jessie Ventura ran in through the side door, picked me up in the recliner, then body slammed us both on the carpet, over and over and over again. I vaguely recall waking up on my side in the fetal position, with tears in my eyes, body soaking wet, both nipples on fire, testicles nowhere to be found, with my left arm tucked under my body in the oddest position, and tingling in my legs? The cat was making meowing sounds I had never heard before, clinging to a picture frame hanging above the fireplace, obviously in an attempt to avoid getting slammed by my body flopping all over the living room. Note: If you ever feel compelled to 'mug' yourself with a taser, one note of caution: there is no such thing as a one second burst when you zap yourself! You will not let go of that thing until it is dislodged from your hand by a violent thrashing about on the floor.. A three second burst would be considered conservative? IT HURT LIKE HELL!!! A minute or so later (I can't be sure, as time was a relative thing at that point), I collected my wits (what little I had left), sat up and surveyed the landscape. My bent reading glasses were on the mantel of the fireplace. The recliner was upside down and about 8 feet or so from where it originally was. My triceps, right thigh and both nipples were still twitching. My face felt like it had been shot up with Novocain, and my bottom lip weighed 88 lbs. I had no control over the drooling. Apparently I pooped on myself, but was too numb to know for sure and my sense of smell was gone. I saw a faint smoke cloud above my h ead which I believe came from my hair. I'm still looking for my nuts and I'm offering a significant reward for their safe return!! P.S. My wife loved the gift, and now regularly threatens me with it! 'If you think education is difficult, try being stupid.'

Christmas Spirit

>> This is worth reading.........>> >> I remember my first Christmas adventure with>> Grandma. I was just a kid. I remember tearing>> across town on my bike to visit her on the day>> my big sister dropped the bomb: "There is no>> Santa Claus," she jeered. "Even dummies know>> that!">> >> My Grandma was not the gushy kind, never had>> been. I fled to her that day because I knew she>> would be straight with me. I knew Grandma>> always told the truth, and I knew that the truth>> always went down a whole lot easier when>> swallowed with one of her "world-famous">> cinnamon buns. I knew they were world-famous,>> because Grandma said so.>> >> It had to be true.>> >> Grandma was home, and the buns were still>> warm. Between bites, I told her everything.>> She was ready for me. "No Santa Claus?">> She snorted...."Ridiculous! Don't believe it.>> That rumor has been going around for years,>> and it makes me mad, plain mad!! Now, put>> on your coat, and let's go.">> >> "Go? Go where, Grandma?" I asked. I hadn't>> even finished my second world-famous>> cinnamon bun.>> >> "Where" turned out to be Kerby's General>> Store, the one store in town that had a little>> bit of just about everything. As we walked>> through its doors, Grandma handed me ten>> dollars.>> >> That was a bundle in those days. "Take this>> money," she said, "and buy something for>> someone who needs it. I'll wait for you in>> the car. "Then she turned and walked out of>> Kerby's.>> >> I was only eight years old. I'd often gone>> shopping with my mother, but never had I>> shopped for anything all by myself.>> >> The store seemed big and crowded, full of>> people scrambling to finish their Christmas>> shopping. For a few moments I just stood>> there, confused, clutching that ten-dollar>> bill, wondering what to buy, and who on>> earth to buy it for. I thoug> ht of everybody>> I knew: my family, my friends, my neighbors,>> the kids at school, and the people who went>> to my church.>> >> I was just about thought out, when I>> suddenly thought of Bobby Decker. He was>> a kid with bad breath and messy hair, and>> he sat right behind me in Mrs. Pollock's>> second grade class.>> >> Bobby Decker didn't have a coat. I knew>> that because he never went out to recess>> during the winter. His mother always wrote>> a note, telling the teacher that he had a>> cough, but all we kids knew that Bobby>> Decker didn't have a cough; he didn't have>> a good coat. I fingered the ten-dollar bill>> with growing excitement. I would buy Bobby>> Decker a coat!>> >> I settled on a red corduroy one that had a>> hood to it. It looked real warm, and he>> would like that.>> >> "Is this a Christmas present for someone?">> the lady behind the counter asked kindly, as>> I laid my ten dollars down.>> >> "Yes, ma'am," I replied shyly. "It 's for>> Bobby.">> >> The nice lady smiled at me, as I told her>> about how Bobby really needed a good winter>> coat. I didn't get any change, but she put>> the coat in a bag, smiled again, and wished>> me a Merry Christmas.>> >> That evening, Grandma helped me wrap the>> coat in Christmas paper and ribbons and>> wrote, "To Bobby, From Santa Claus" on it(a>> little tag fell out of the coat, and Grandma>> tucked it in her Bible). Grandma said that>> Santa always insisted on secrecy. Then she>> drove me over to Bobby Decker's house,>> explaining as we went that I was now and>> forever officially, one of Santa's helpers.>> >> Grandma parked down the street from>> Bobby's house, and she and I crept>> noiselessly and hid in the bushes by his>> front walk.>> >> Then Grandma gave me a nudge. "All right,>> Santa Claus," she whispered, "get going.">> >> I took a deep breath, dashed for his front>> door, threw the present down on his step,>> pounded his door and flew back to the>> safety of the bushes and Grandma.>> >> Together we waited breathlessly in the>> darkness for the > front door to open. Finally>> it did, and there stood Bobby.>> >> Fifty years haven't dimmed the thrill of>> those moments spent shivering, beside my>> Grandma, in Bobby Decker's bushes.>> >> That night, I realized that those awful>> rumors about Santa Claus were just what>> Grandma said they were: ridiculous. Santa>> was alive and well, and we were on his team.>> I still have the Bible, with the coat tag>> tucked inside: $19.95.>> >> May you always have LOVE to share. And>> may you always believe in the magic of>> Santa Claus

Why God made Moms~A Childs Survey

WHY GOD MADE MOMS
Answers given by 2nd grade school children to the following questions: Why did God make mothers? 1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is. 2. Mostly to clean the house. 3. To help us out of there when we were getting born. How did God make mothers? 1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us. 2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring. 3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts. What ingredients are mothers made of ? 1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean. 2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think. Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom? 1. We're related. 2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me. What kind of little girl was your mom? 1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff. 2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy. 3. They say she used to be nice. What did Mom need to know about dad before she married him? 1. His last name. 2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer? 3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores? Why did your mom marry your dad? 1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot. 2. She got too old to do anything else with him. 3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on. Who's the boss at your house? 1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball. 2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed. 3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad. What's the difference between moms & dads? 1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work. 2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them. 3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's. 4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine. What does your mom do in her spare time? 1. Mothers don't do spare time. 2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long. What would it take to make your mom perfect? 1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery. 2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue. If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be? 1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that. 2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me. 3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.

I LOVE YOU

I love you; I'll miss you; hurry home; be careful; simple little phrases so often left unsaid. I myself am guilty of being in to big of a hurry, or to resentful, pig-headed or just to tired to take the time to say these things to those I love.
Wednesday, November 26th (yes the day before Thanksgiving) a very good friend of ours was killed in a car accident. He left behind a wife and two teen-age kids. He has been a huge part of a barrel racing family. He was always on the sidelines cheering his kids on. Taylor his daughter is a phenomenal barrel racer and his son Austin a great hockey player. Tim was always there for his kids as well as for his friends, many of the kids called him their adopted dad!
Hearing the news of his death hit me in the gut as deeply as if I had been kicked. And one of my first thoughts was, what if that was my husband, the father to my kids? What would I do, how would we go on? And especially, what might have my last words to him have been?
It was a big wake-up call for me. I know that death is inevitable, it will happen to us all. We don't know when that day will come, and it can happen in a split second with no notice at all like in Tim's life. The only thing we can do is to try to remember that another day, minute or second chance to say "I love You" is not guaranteed and should not be taken for granted.
While I will be praying for Tim's family, I will also be praying for the Lord to help me to be more appreciative for each and every blessing I have in my life and to never miss an opportunity to say "I Love You".

I'm Thankful

I Am Thankful: For The Wife Who Says It's Hot Dogs Tonight, Because She Is Home With Me,And Not Out With Someone Else. For The Husband Who Is On The Sofa Being A Couch Potato, Because He Is Home With Me And Not Out At The Bars. For The Teenager Who Is Complaining About Doing Dishes Because It Means She Is At Home, Not On The Streets. For The Taxes I Pay Because It Means I Am Employed . For The Mess To Clean After A Party Because It Means I Have Been Surrounded By Friends. For The Clothes That Fit A Little Too Snug Because It Means I Have Enough To Eat. For My Shadow That Watches Me Work Because It Means I Am Out In The Sunshine For A Lawn That Needs Mowing, Windows That Need Cleaning, And Gutters That Need Fixing Because It Means I Have A Home For All The Complaining I Hear About The Government Because It Means We Have Freedom Of Speech. For The Parking Spot I Find At The Far End Of The Parking Lot Because It Means I Am Capable Of Walking And I Have Been Blessed With Transportation . For My Huge Heating Bill Because It Means I Am Warm. For The Lady Behind Me In Church Who Sings Off Key Because It Means I Can Hear. For The Pile Of Laundry And Ironing Because It Means I Have Clothes To Wear. For Weariness And Aching Muscles At The End Of The Day Because It Means I Have Been Capable Of Working Hard. For The Alarm That Goes Off In The Early Morning Hours Because It Means I Am Alive. And I Am Thankful: For The Crazy People I Have In My Life Because They Make Life Interesting And Fun

Lola

Meet the newest addition to the Funny Farm; her name is Lola. She was thrown out on the side of the road along with a Shitzu (not sure if that's spelled right) Unfortunatly, the Shitzu ran and couldn't be caught; but Lola was saved! We aren't sure what kind of dog she is exactly; Black Lab, Pit, Boxer?? I'd love any input anyone might have on her breeding. So far she is adjusting well to the other critters, and we are "trying " to adjust to all the puppy puddles and chewed up socks, sofas, tupperware etc. etc. etc.

Thanksgiving Divorce

A man in Phoenix calls his son in New York two days before Thanksgiving and says,'I hate to ruin your day, but I have to tell you that your mother and I are divorcing; forty-five years of misery is enough. 'Pop, what are you talking about?' the son screams.We can't stand the sight of each other any longer,' the father says. 'We're sick of each other, and I'm sick of talking about this, so you call your sister in Chicago and tell her.'Frantic, the son calls his sister, who explodes on the phone. 'Like heck they're getting divorced,' she shouts,
'I'll take care of this,'She calls Phoenix immediately, and screams at her father, 'You are NOT getting divorced. Don't do a single thing until I get there. I'm calling my brother back, and we'll both be there tomorrow. Until then, don't do a thing,
DO YOU HEAR ME?' and hangs up.The old man hangs up his phone and turns to his wife. 'Okay,' he says,'they're coming for Thanksgiving and paying their own way.'

Rules for Teens

Subject: Teenage Rules > > > > > Subject: Teenage Rules > > > Teenage Rules > > Raising teenagers is a challenge, so my hubby and I came up > with the following rules to help the kids understand what > was expected of them during their pre-adult status. > > Rules of This Household > > 1. If you are not here for dinner, too bad. This is not a > fast-food place where the cook is on duty at all times. The > cook works full time and does not need a second job. > > 2. If you make a mess, clean it up. The dishwasher is open > 24 hours a day to service you as are the vacuum, broom, and > sponge. Please help them to help you by using them. If you > need assistance, ask the cook -- she will be happy to give > you training on any of the equipment. > > 3. The taxi service for this household is not on call 24 > hours. You must make reservations at least 12 hours in > advance. You have two good legs, skateboards, and bikes; several good horses > most are somewhat operational; Use them. By the way, skateboards are to be used on > the outside of this house and are never to be used in the > living room just because the landing is softer when you > fall. > > 4. We are not a bank and you have no collateral to offer us. > Face it: We own everything you have and I have receipts to > prove it, so don't ask us for loans. Get jobs! We have them. > Try it and you might like it (not so much the work as the > money). > > 5. Curfew is negotiable, but try not to be late too often > because it could go either way. > > 6. Tell us where you are going. GOOD GRIEF! I am way older > than you, and I still tell my mother where I am going when I > am at her house. Leave us a note or try to form words > describing where you are going while we are in the room with > you. Honestly, we don't bite unless provoked. > > 7. You know how to use a phone. Some of you even have cell > phones. We like to hear your voice if you are going to be > late. You can use a phone to find out what's for dinner, to > let us know you made it to wherever all right, or just to > let us hear your beautiful voice. > > 8. No food in your room, the living room, the bathroom, or > anywhere in the house other than the kitchen or dining area > EVER! How many times do I have to say this? > > 9. You do not contribute financially in any way, shape, or > form to this household, so try to pull your weight in other > ways: Clean something, put something away, surprise us by > doing it before we ask. Otherwise, you may find yourself > financially supporting yourself on the OUTSIDE of this > house.

F-stops, Apperture, ISO....Oh My !!!!!

Love/Hate affair with Manuel Mode on the new Cannon
Well, just in case I didn't have enough hobbies and because I always have so much extra time on my hands (right)... I have decided that I'm finally going to try to master the manual art of photography. We bought our fancy SLR and lens over a year ago, and I had yet to try anything outside of fully automatic. I always look at other blogs and some of their pictures are just so much better....so frustrating!! Well, the difference is auto versus manual so I've discovered. Well, I thought it would be no problem to tackle that learning curve. Um, news flash to me. I have bought a few books on exposure and learning apperture/ ISO/ F-stops/ etc..... and finally learning that all those fun numbers on my camera do actually have a purpose. Well, it's beyond confusing! I need major tutorials...I'll be adding some that I took of Layla playing outside soon. There still atrocious but at least they're somewhat in focus (you have no idea what a feat that is).

I am a Hydrangea What Flower Are You?

Things I Learnt living in Texas

1. A possum is a flat animal that sleeps in the middle of the road. 2. There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 of them live in Texas. 3. There are 10,000 types of spiders. All 10,000 of them live in Texas, plus a couple no one's seen before. 4. If it grows, it'll stick ya. If it crawls, it'll bite cha. 5. 'Onced' and 'Twiced' are words. 6. It is not a shopping cart, it is abuggy! 7. 'Jaw-P?' means 'Did ya'll go to the bathroom?' 8. People actually grow and eat okra. 9. 'Fixinto' is one word. 10. There is no such thing as 'lunch'. There is only dinner and then there is supper. 11. Iced tea is appropriate for all meals and you start drinking it when you're two. We do like a little tea with our sugar. 12. Backwards and forwards means 'I know everything about you.' 13. The word 'jeet' is actually a phrase meaning 'Did you eat?' 14. You don't have to wear a watch, because it doesn't matter what time it is, you work until you're done or it's too dark to see. 15. You don't PUSH buttons, you MASHEM. 16. 'No. Jew?' is a common response to the question 'Did you bring any beer?' 17. You measure distance in minutes. 18. You switch from heat to A/C in the same day. 19. All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable, grain, insect or animal. 20. You know what a 'DAWG' is. 21. You carry jumper cables in your car --- for your OWN car. 22. You only own five spices: salt, pepper, Tony's, Tabasco and Ketchup. 23. The local papers cover national and international news on one page, but require 6 pages for local high school sports and motor sports, andgossip. 24. You think that the first day of deer season is a national holiday. 25. You find 100 degrees Fahrenheit 'a bit warm'. 26. You know all four seasons: Almost summer, summer, still summer, and Christmas. 27. Going to Wal-Mart is a favorite past time know as 'goin' Wal-Martin' or 'off to Wally World'. 28. You describe the first cool snap (below 70 degrees) as good chicken stew weather. 29. Fried catfish is the other white meat. 30. We don't need no dang driver's Ed. If our mama says we can drive, we can drive dag-nabbit. 31. You understand these jokes and forward them to your Texas friends and those who just wish they were from Texas.

We lost Belle; our loyal friend

Yesterday we lost our 11 year old German Shepard Belle. We aren't sure exactly what happened, but we think she must have had a heart attack or aneurysm, something along those lines. We let her out to play and shortly after we found her lying dead on the front lawn. She had not been ill and was in great spirits when we let her out. She was a dear friend and will be dearly missed.

Texas Rules

Rules of Texas :> 1. Pull your droopy pants up. You look like an idiot.> > 2. Let's get this straight; it's called a> 'gravel road.' I> drive a> pickup truck because I want to. No matter how slow you> drive, you're> going to get dust on your Lexus. Drive it or get out of the> way.> > 3. They are cattle & oil wells. That's what they> smell like to you.> They> smell like money to us. Get over it. Don't like it?> I-20 and I-10 go> east and west, I-35 goes north and south. Pick one.> > 4.. So you have a $60,000 car. We're impressed. We have> $250,000 cotton> strippers that are driven only 3 weeks a year.> > 5. So every person in every pickup waves. It's called> being friendly.> Try to understand the concept.> > 6. If that cell phone rings while a bunch of doves are> coming in, we> WILL shoot it out of your hand. You better hope you> don't have it up to> your ear at the time.> > 7. Yeah, we eat catfish & crawfish. You really want> sushi & caviar?> It's> available at the corner bait shop.> > 8. The 'Opener' refers to the first day of deer> season. It's a> religious> holiday held the closest Saturday to the first of November.> > 9. We open doors for women. That is applied to all women,> regardless of> age.> > 10. No, there's no 'vegetarian special' on the> menu. Order steak.> Or you> can order the Chef's Salad and pick off the 2 pounds of> ham & turkey.> > 11. When we fill out a table, there are three main dishes:> meats,> vegetables, and breads. We use three spices: salt, pepper,> and Picante> Sauce!! Oh, yeah....We don't care what you folks in> Cincinnati call that> stuff you eat...IT AIN'T REAL CHILI!! Chili was born> and bred in San> Antonio ....and real chili never met a bean!> > 12. You bring 'coke' into my house, it better be> brown, wet, and served> over ice. You bring 'Mary Jane' into my house, she> better be cute, know> how to shoot, and drive a truck.> > 13. College and High School Football is as important here> as the Lakers> and the Knicks, and a dang site more fun to watch.> > 14. Yeah, we have golf courses. But don't hit the water> hazards -- it> spooks the fish.> > 15. Colleges? Try Texas Tech, Texas A&M or University> of Texas . They> come outta there with an education plus a love for God and> country, and> they still wave at passing pickups when they come for the> holidays.> > 16. We have more folks in the Army, Navy, Air Force, and> Marines, than> any other state, so 'Don't Mess with Texas ,'> If you do, you will> get> whupped by the best.> > 17. Always remember what our great governor Sam Houston> once said:> ' Texas can make it without the United States , but the> United States> can't make it without Texas !'> > Texas is the greatest state ever!! If you are from Texas> you are one bad> hombre!!! If you do not share this with someone in the next> 10 min. you> are not a true Texan!!!!!!

Is it just Me.................????

Is it just me or is there just somethin' about a horsey hug that can make even the bleakest of days brighter? Of course there were no cookies in my pocket to persuade that hug...LOL

Just a another day in Paradise...................

The thunderstorms have passed; no tornados hit us; and it's just another day in Paradise. Bunny and Dvus enjoying some Fall sunshine!

The problem with women today.............

Written by my friend Mike; Amen Mike!

Would you like to know what the problem is with the 21st century woman? All you need to do is look at the 21st century man. We as men have created 90% of the issues that we have with women and how they act. Women are born with attributes like being loving,caring,compassionate, and comforting just to name a few.What we as men have done with all the games we have played throughout the years is cause them to build these walls of mistrust around their hearts. I know most men will never admit this but we have taken the great ways of a woman for granted for years and it needs to stop now. Let me give you an example of the 21st century relationship, when men get involved we try to be everything a woman wants right up until we get content that we have her. In the beginning we will come in and go to her with a hug and a kiss, most of the time saying something like "I missed you today or Baby you mean the world to me”. now lets jump forward about 3 months, we come in and go to the couch and sit our asses down and say something like "is supper done yet”. Think about it guys, when you want to say that she is the one that has changed maybe you should ask yourself how much you have changed. For a woman little things that we do are more of an example to her of our true feelings about her.
When you’re asking yourself why she has lost her sex drive because things were really hot and heavy at first, maybe it's because you've stopped making love to her. Let me guess, most of you guys aren't real sure what I’m talking about since you think making love is a "physical" thing right! I would like to inform you that you "make love" to a woman form the time you wake up until you close your eyes to go to sleep. You do it by all the little things to make her happy just like you did in the begining.Don't think that doing these things and showing her how you really feel makes you any less of a man. A real man knows what is important and when you get that part figured out you won't be asking what the hell happened to your relationship.
I would like to end this with the only true advice I know to give. If you think back to the beginning of time when God created Adam it didn't take him very long to realize that we weren't going to last very long by ourselves, so then God GAVE us Eve. If somebody gives you something it is considered a gift right. So all I know to say is "TREAT HER LIKE A GIFT FROM GOD CAUSE THAT IS EXACTLY WHAT SHE IS"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

King Charles

Simply Royalty

This can't be good..............

This is what I found when I got home tonight. My truck lifted up on blocks and the transmission sitting on the cement next to it. Something tells me this is going to get expensive.

Critters & Kids

http://picasaweb.google.com/fotogrl.08/MyLifeOnTheFunnyFarm?authkey=MOmAst9Bg-A#5251599976305484930

Bunny

Bunny is our 9 year old Jack Russell Terrier. She is exterminator extraordinar. If Bunny's in the barn; mice beware!

Fall

Fall is absolutly my favorite time of the year. I love the first morning that I walk outside and the air just smells different. You can just smell "Fall". The morning become more crisp. The evenings cool down to perfect "porch sittin" weather. All around the colors are changing. Shades of brown, yellow, orange, sage, and periwinkle. Pumpkins start showing up at the local grocery store. Seeing scarecrows and haybales are natural occurances. Neighbors and friends have their doors adorned with fall flowers and wreathes. Fall festivals are popping up all over the county, and Big Tex has made his apperance at the State Fair. These are just a few of my favorite Fall things.